Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
