I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
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