The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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