Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
the raccoons are back...
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