hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Vodka?
Forever.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
