I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
