Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
