awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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