he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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