That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
