I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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