Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
