oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
