rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
