I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize
