He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
its liver damage thursday
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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