glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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