My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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