all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
