I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
