I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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