ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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