I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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