sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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