He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
