O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
