I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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