We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
