I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
