I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Green mimosas i think yes
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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