But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I look better un-naked...
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he was CRYING into my vagina
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
