You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Little spoons don't ask big questions
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
