I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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