He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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