youre lurking in front of me
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
