this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
