hotel room ftw
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
