either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
