My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
So apparently I’m into choking now
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize