He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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