Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
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