I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
