My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
