Having a random hookup so left but love u
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
