He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
