Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
