I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
