clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
