He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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