sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
