I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
